#AmWriting #GuestPost – My Unsupportive Ex, Imposter Syndrome @elodiegarroway

I am thrilled to bring you a super guest blog post from a romance author who I think is brilliant – Élodie Garroway. I am a fan of her romance stories and I am excited she’s here today on my blog putting a unique twist on Imposter Syndrome.

Please welcome Élodie Garroway.

Hi everyone.

If you’ve ever tried to create something, you’ve heard the term “Imposter Syndrome.” Imposter Syndrome is feeling like your skills and talents are in doubt, not by others but by you.

I’ve been having a not-so-secret affair with imposter syndrome since I was seventeen.

I had secured an audition for a school of music I wanted to attend. It wasn’t a perfect audition but I got in. I was proud until I realized I was one of two trombone players. I got in because of what I played, not what I could do– quantity over quality.

And that is how I met my unsupportive Ex, Imposter Syndrome. It didn’t matter if everything it said was lies. I believed it. It ate at my confidence. It invaded my speech, my actions. In spite of it, I graduated top five.

I made it. Right? That ish was over?

I wish.

This Ex invaded every aspect of my life and I unknowingly made it room, questioning how I was raising my son, teaching my students, and yes, my writing.

And I am not its only relationship, maybe you know it too?

So how do we do ensure we never get back together, even though they keep coming back?

Keep telling yourself you are amazing until you believe it.

There is nothing more powerful than positive self-talk. Remember it’s you. You feed the syndrome and let it pay rent in your mind. Naturally only you can keep it at bay. You have to decide to not feed it anymore. Just like you tell that ex that you aren’t getting back together, you have to tell yourself, “I’ve got this. I can write. My words are worth reading.”

Surround yourself with positive people.

It’s hard to make headway if the inner voice doesn’t match the out voices. Maybe those who love you can’t get on board with your “hobby.” That’s okay because we exist. Who’s we? Why the writing community of course! Trust me, if you have a genre, there is a group for you. Just find us. We want to meet you and support you!

Prove yourself wrong over and over again.

The Ex won’t stop calling with nasty comments? Fine. Prove it wrong. Do you doubt your world-building abilities? Take a class or ask a fellow writer for help, find a way to learn and improve. Then what can the voice say? Challenge that voice and make its argument worthless.

Do what scares you.

Don’t be the one holding you back. It is scary to put yourself out there. I put it off for years. I didn’t hit the top of anything the first time I published solo. Heck, I still haven’t. That doesn’t mean I should give up. What I should do is put myself out there again.

You should too. Even if you get a negative response. Then go back to number three and now prove them wrong. Keep doing what scares you, it’s the only way to move forward.

And break up with Imposter Syndrome. It never did anything for you anyway.

Author bio

Élodie’s first taste of reality came from her Southern upbringing.  She climbed majestic Dogwoods, chased fireflies, and ran from mosquitoes and no-see-ems.  This idyllic world helped her see beauty, love and magic all come with a cost.  That never stopped her from dreaming big!

Life continued to reinforce its duality – she overcame personal trials that would threaten her life and her vision.  Dreams don’t die easily, so she pushed through and found a way to share the love stories that kept her on the lighter side of life.

She also managed to find her brooding prince and against all odds, have the most wonderful son with an imagination that rivals hers.  Proving once again, the price of love is always worth it!

Grab a mason jar of lemonade and let Elodie Garroway show you the ups and downs of real love, so you can Capture the Feeling.

Élodie’s contact links

Élodie’s Website: https://elodiegarroway.com
Learning to Love Again: https://books2read.com/u/mYZGQM
Joyeux Noël, Elinor: https://books2read.com/u/3yeadL
Falling for Farris: https://books2read.com/u/b6OvW0

10 Lessons I Learned From 6 Years of Blogging #Blogger

This is a strange time to be living in right now. The world feels like it’s in chaos. So, this week I have decided to write about something which gives me strength and makes me positive; my blog.

I am a few weeks away from my 6th year blogging anniversary. Still can’t believe I have been blogging for that long. What started out as something to give me a break from my squabbling children, rugby mad husband and boisterous pets on wet Sunday afternoons has turned into a big part of my life.

Here are 10 lessons from my 6 years of blogging:

1. Blogging is like a fertile creative soil and other things grow from it. This is the thing which has surprised me. My blog has grown and nurtured so many creative projects; my Roxy Collins diary which went super crazy on Wattpad, my Roxy Collins podcast which I recorded whilst locked inside my teenage daughter’s cupboard every Friday after a few gin & tonics, my novel, my book blogging and a LOT of short stories.

2. My happiest times have been when I stopped caring about blog stats. When I wrote The Diary of Roxy Collins as a weekly serial I never gave two hoots about my blog stats. This was one of my best times as a blogger. There’s something in this because when I recorded my podcast deep inside my daughter’s shoe cupboard and put each episode live I didn’t care about stats or numbers. I had so much fun. It lit me upside. Like someone had turned on a light. It was only when I started looking at my blog stats and podcast data that the good times ended.

3. The bad blogging times have been signals in disguise that I need to change direction. Looking back now I can see this more clearly. However, when you are fed up with blogging and can’t face turning up to write a post each week it’s hard to see. All my bad blogging times have been the start of change.

4. Blogging breaks are marvellous things. You don’t have to quit blogging, you just need a break. I am so glad I found blogging breaks and took them. It’s so nice to come back after a few months feeling rejuvenated and created.

5. Blogging is a stress buster. Writing a blog post is for me one of the best ways to relieve stress.

6. Blogs are like trees. They take years of nurture and love to grow. They will chart your creative journey and they will one day bear creative fruits. These fruits might not bring you fame and fortune but they will be of great value to you in other ways. The great thing about life is that you won’t be able to see their value straightaway. One day you will stop and think – ‘wow – that blog post changed my life.’

7. Getting my blog links to work was one of my biggest struggles. Oh my goodness – other bloggers struggle with SEO rankings and branding. Me – well I struggled with copying, pasting and inserting a link into a little box for 2 YEARS! 🙈

8. My blog has been a great teacher. Its taught me about all sorts of things like checking for typos, grammar and resilience.

9. Fictional characters who were born inside my blog posts will never leave me. Roxy Collins – I will do something with you. I promise ❤️

10. I have met some fabulous and life changing people on my blog. They have been a huge part of my journey and without them I wouldn’t be here today.

Thank you to everyone who reads, comments and shares my posts week in and week out. You are all fabulous. 🌸📚

If you don’t have a blog and want something creative to do during these strange times, I would strongly recommend starting one. Blogs are great stress busters, they make excellent journals and you never know what might come of it 📚