Dear My Thirty Something Self
I’m sorry Thirty Something Self but I found this today while having a sort out.
After two pages of you rattling on about how you are dreading being in your forties I found myself rolling my eyes and shaking my head in disapproval. You wrote an entire NOTEBOOK about how you didn’t want to be forty something? For goodness sake, woman, put that ridiculous notebook away and read this!
You’ll be glad to know I’ve clocked up another year on the birthday front and I am now embracing all that the fabulous forties have to offer. Seeing as though you have written War & Peace on not wanting to be in your forties, I thought I would write and give you some insight into the age you’re currently dreading – the forties! *evil laugh*
If I have one piece of advice to give you then it is this – stop dreading the forties and more importantly the late forties (the downhill bit after forty-five as you call it 😂). Stop wasting time filling out notebooks with worries. Your forties will surprise you.
You know that terrifying dog fear you currently have? The one which makes you freeze and tremble at the sight of any dog. That fear which will make you sit in your car outside your friend’s house because being near her dog brings on your panic attacks… well check the photo out below. This is you on your 47th birthday. That dog is your best friend.
Too late? What the hell is this? Yes, you have a dream of writing a book which keeps you up at night and one which won’t go away. The dream which you keep trying to ignore because you don’t think you are capable of writing a decent book and you have got it into your head it will be too late. Well, check the photo out below. You will publish that book at forty-five.
You know you read loads of books when the kids are in bed and you would love to one day be able to share your views on books with other like minded bookish people? Well check out the photo below. You will start your own blog in 2014 (aged 41) and it will be one of your best decisions. Not only will you get to write blog posts but you will also get to be part of book blog tours. These tours will give you the chance to meet (virtually) well known authors and talk about their books.
You know how you dream about going on holiday with a group of girlfriends and having a ball? The dream you ignore because you don’t think you will ever see yourself leaving the kids and your husband for a week – yes that one. Check out the photo below. This is you at 45 with your blogging and writing friends in Croatia having a fabulous time.
Oh and by the way you get that writing desk in the living room you’ve always secretly dreamed about. Yes – you also get to fill it with lovely things which make you feel happy when you look at them. That’s one of the joys of being 46 and hearing the inner whisper of f*** it, I am forty six, I will do what I want. So empowering that whisper!
I’m not going to tell you what’s going on in the world in 2020 because that will scare the life out of you.
A few downsides. You will have a battle with your anxiety but you will muddle your way through. At 46 you will get the CBT therapy you will wish you’d started having in your thirties. It will be life changing and your head will feel lighter.
Hormones will start having a party of their own from 46 onwards. My advice to you now is start bulk buying handheld electric fans.
You might want to think about moving away from the ultra skinny jeans as once in your forties your hips and thighs will feel like they have magically expanded.
Enjoy your late thirties and stop wasting time about dreading your forties. They really are something special.
By the time you reach your forties it will slowly dawn on you that every age is a gift and some people don’t get offered that gift. Here’s what you will say to yourself on your 47th birthday: life has only just got started.
Your forty something self 😍